Helping you become more self-compassionate and less hard on yourself. 

Anxiety Therapy and Perfectionism

Online LGBTQ+ therapy in Minneapolis and throughout MN for queer, trans, and nonbinary adults.

You might not be here to specifically talk about the fact that you’re LGBTQ+. You just want someone who gets it so that we can get to work on your anxiety.

You might be someone who:

  • Notices your mind spiral, worrying that you are letting people down.

  • Judges yourself for not doing better when things don’t go as planned.

  • Often thinks “If I can’t do it right or excel at it, why do it at all?”

  • Has people telling you that you’re doing great and accomplishing a lot, but you don’t feel that way about yourself.

However anxiety, perfectionism, and self-criticism show up in your life, I’m glad you landed here. Read on to see if my anxiety and perfectionism therapy services might be what you need.

Maybe you’ve tried calming the anxiety by frequently checking in with others or seeking assurance from them.

You end up overthinking conversations and interactions you have. It robs you from being present and enjoying the moment because you spend most of your time stuck in your head. 

…Or you may be someone who tries hiding the anxiety from others. You worry people will see your anxiety as weakness. You pretend everything is fine, and when someone sees your anxiety, you feel like you failed.

Together we will name and tend to the feelings that are beneath the anxiety.

Instead of ignoring them, we will face them compassionately and curiously. Once these feelings are acknowledged and responded to, you will notice yourself being more at ease. We will help you embrace more of yourself, not just the parts you are proud of, but the quirks and imperfections too. We will free you from the belief that if you fail at something, you are a failure. 

Are you ready to let go of the pressure to be perfect?

My experiences with anxiety and perfectionism

I’ve worked with people on anxiety and self-criticism since 2013, with the majority of that time spent supporting Millennial and Gen Z folks. I’ve come to see how common anxiety and self-criticism can be, and how much pressure there is to not make mistakes or be flawed. It’s scary and anxiety-provoking to grow up in a society with mass shootings, the pandemic, climate crisis, and economic crisis. All the while, there’s added pressure to keep achieving and keep yourself together in the meantime. 

As a queer woman with my own experiences of self-criticism, I have an understanding of how holding a marginalized identity plays into anxiety and the pressure to be flawless. You feel you have to be perfect because people will use your actions to not only judge you, but to also judge people who share your identities. 

Questions You May Have About Anxiety Therapy:

  • Some common signs that it’s time to seek support:

    -The inner dialogue with yourself has become more harsh.

    -Friends or loved ones worry about you or they’ve commented on your anxiety.

    -You’re avoiding or forgetting certain work or school tasks because of your anxiety.

    Basically, it’s a good idea to start therapy if the anxiety is having a negative impact on your relationships, your professional life, or your relationship with yourself. You can also start therapy simply because you want to!

    Read more on my blog (here) about the signs that it’s time to start anxiety therapy.

  • Some anxiety in our lives is normal and healthy. What I want for you is not to get rid of all anxiety in your life, but to lessen it to a healthier amount. That way, we still have anxiety working in your favor when you need that kick of motivation in your day to day life. Together we will work towards you feeling empowered in managing your anxiety. Therapy helps with anxiety by finding peace and acceptance with your anxiety, and confidence that you can handle it.

  • Oftentimes underneath feelings of anxiety and thoughts of perfectionism is the belief: I’m not ______ enough. As LGBTQ+ people we are subjected to homophobic, biphobic, and transphobic messages that echo this sentiment. It’s common for LGBTQ+ people to internalize this. We might subconsciously feel like we aren’t good enough and we need to somehow make up for the fact we are LGBTQ+ instead of cis-het. If this is the case for you, it’s incredibly valuable to get anxiety therapy with a LGBTQ+ mental health specialized therapist.